supersayainmilk:

smurflewis:

smurflewis:

smurflewis:

smurflewis:

smurflewis:

Today I walk into work and there are a ton of people in my building and it’s kind of a mess and everyone is talking and I sort of just blurt out:

“Man, it’s a zoo in here!”

Everyone stopped and looked at me as though I had 2 heads.

Then I realized.

I work at a zoo.

Update: my boss was talking about how he was really excited for an entire week of vacation and was wondering what he should do, so I looked him dead in the eye and told him, with a straight face,

“You should visit the local Zoo, I heard it’s really nice.”

Under pain of death I am no longer allowed to make any zoo related jokes.

Part three: I was cleaning the squirrel monkeys and one of them kept trying to climb up me so I sort of just yelled

“WILL YOU STOP MONKEYING AROUND??”

I forgot my boss was in the next room and he walked and just glared at me

Another update:

I was in the reptile house and one of the new interns looked like they needed some help grabbing a snake so I just blurted out:

“Let me slither on over there and help”

They actually appreciated the pun XD

So I’m in the kangaroo yard and my boss says “they need more water, hop to it.” And I kind of look at him not sure if he said that on purpose but he looks back with such horror and just whispers “I hope you’re happy” and walks away.

I hope you’re happy

lily-peet:

You can tell a lot about a person based on the wear on their keyboard.

If the spacebar has a smooth circle in the center, they’re a writer.

If the WASD keys are worn out, they’re a PC gamer.

If the Z key has been burrowed through the keyboard to form a hole through the desk, they’re an artist.

missmentelle:

Health insurance is a mental health issue. I can’t help a client who can’t afford to see me. 

Housing is a mental health issue. I can’t use therapy to help a client whose depression and anxiety come directly from sleeping in the streets. 

Food insecurity is a mental health issue. I can’t help a client who isn’t taking their medication because their pills say “take with food” and they have nothing to eat.

Healthcare is a mental health issue. I can’t help a client whose “depression” is actually a thyroid condition they can’t afford to get treated. 

Wages are a mental health issue. I can’t help a client whose anxiety comes from the fact that they are one missed shift away from not being able to make rent.

Child care is a mental health issue. I can’t help a client who works 80 hours per week to afford daycare, and doesn’t have the time or energy left to come see me. 

Drug policing is a mental health issue. I can’t help a client who ended up in prison because they got caught self-medicating with illegal substances. 

Police brutality is a mental health issue. I can’t help a client whose ‘anxiety’ is a very real and justified fear of ending up as a hashtag. 

If you’re going to make a stand for improving mental health, you have to understand that addressing mental health goes way beyond hiring more therapists and talking about mental health on social media. If we’re really serious about tackling this mental health problem as a country, it means rolling up our sleeves and taking down the barriers that prevent people from getting the help they need – even if those people are different than us, lead different lives, and make choices we don’t agree with. 

We aren’t “fixing” mental health unless we’re fixing it for everybody.Â