the question ‘should lesbians have to date trans women’? is a question that shows the epitome of cis privilege. ppl here are acting like society is forcing cis women to date trans women and acting like society as a whole respects trans women’s gender. questions like this are intentionally meant paint cis women as some helpless victims to trans women and make it seem that trans women have some privilege over cis women. which they don’t. these questions are so transphobic because there will always be a transphobic response/debate. Like these questions are made to make it seem like trans women are out here harming cis women and forcing them into relationships, thus making it seen like they have some privilege. which they don’t….
Yeah, this.
Because the answer to the question they are pretending to ask is the same as the answer to the question “does a person have to date another person” which Is already known by everyone: no.
Of course not, nobody should be forced to date anybody. There’s no possible debate there.
Therefore the only possible Interpretation of the question they are actually asking is “should lesbians consider trans women as valid women”
I was talking to my mom the other day, and she said she was going to start going to the gym, because its important care for your body. I’m disabled w/ multiple chronic illnesses, so going to the gym is impossible for me. She seemed to realize this, and started to backtrack, saying like – its part of taking care of herself, and I interrupted and said, “Its okay mom. You and I taking care of ourselves look very different”. And thats what I would like you to know.
Taking care of yourself looks different.
For some people, taking care of themselves looks like fruit smoothies and gym visits, cutting out sugar and weight training.
For some people, taking care of themselves looks like hospital visits, feeding tubes and ports. Needles and tests.
For some people, taking care of themselves looks like taking medication and lying down in a cool dark room.
For some people, taking care of themselves looks like getting any calories in their body that they can.
For some people, taking care of themselves looks like adding in more vegetables and trying to go outside to get sun more often.
For some people, taking care of themselves looks like seeing a therapist, keeping symptom journals, and practicing mindfulness, meds, or grounding techniques.
We all have different needs. Please don’t feel bad about how you care for yourself just because someone else is able to do “more”, or their care is more performative or obvious. Please don’t look down on someone for caring for themselves in a way that you do not. Medication and rest are just as important as exercise and vegetables.
Keep doing your best to care for yourself, the best way you know how. Your self care and health is important, no matter what it looks like.
when you think of an embarrassing memory try and remember this:
think of one person, it could be your best friend or a random classmate/ coworker
now try and remember two embarrassing things they’ve done in their lives
if you cant, chances are no one can remember yours!
if you can remember, do you really care? probably not. how often do you reflect on other peoples lives? probably not often. no one reallycares about your embarrassing moment either! they’re too busy thinking about theirs.
Thoughtfulfangirling 